[T2] Zen of Cynicism (Friday)

[C. Dreike]

And don't forget:
Eat a live frog every morning and nothing worse will happen to you all 
day.

Chris

Scientists seek to understand what is,
while engineers seek to create what never was.
As the "Bad Astronomer" Phil Plait says, "Teach a man to reason, and 
he can think for a lifetime."



From: "Robert Mann" <robtmann7 at gmail.com>
To: "VW type 2 late aircooled" <type2 at type2.com>
Sent: Friday, August 16, 2013 1:07 AM
Subject: [T2] Zen of Cynicism (Friday)




1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead.  Do not walk ahead of
me, for I may not follow.  Do not walk beside me either.  Just pretty
much leave me alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and
leaky tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn.  So if you're going to filch your
neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

4. Don't be irreplaceable.  If you can't be replaced, you can't be 
promoted.

5. Always remember that you're unique.  So is everyone else.

6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple
car payments.

8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their
shoes.  That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you
have their shoes.

9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.  Teach him how to
fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all da .

11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was
probably a wise investment.

12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and
put it back in your pocket.

16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.

17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'.  It has a light side and a dark
side, and it holds the universe together.

18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are 
moving.

20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need 
it.

21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

AND
22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a
laxative on the same night.